Description

Lynn watched her beloved Clare, newly adopted from Haiti, crawl the house in a frantic search for her lost mother.

Preschool Clare enchanted with belly laughs and shining smiles. Also, thrashed and wailed in her room as Lynn crouched on her own bed—pillow clutched over her head—her past trauma triggered. A pre-teen trip to Haiti brought sunshine, ruby red hibiscus blooms, and the music of Haitian Creole. Back at home, Clare shattered mirrors into shards on the subway tiles of their bathroom. And just before her thirteenth birthday, as she and Lynn walked hand in hand through their neighborhood, Clare calmly detailed her plan to die.

Over the next years, Lynn and her family walked through psychiatric hospitals, along the Appalachian Trail, and in and out of residential placements, marriage, faith, and sanity barely surviving the journey. But then Lynn learned about fetal alcohol spectrum disorder (FASD)—a source of neurodivergence in one in twenty American children—and discovered the FASCETS Neurobehavioral Model, a strengths-based approach to celebrating and accommodating neurodiversity. It was a discovery that transformed them all.

At times joyous, at times harrowing, but always full of love, Tinderbox is a mother’s story of brokenness, unrelenting resilience, and hope.

(2023, paperback, 296 pages)

Staff Member Review

I have mixed feelings about this book. There are a lot of emotions packed into this family’s story of adoption, neurodivergence, and spirituality. There are aspects of the narrative that I feel concerned about and aspects that I find admirable and thought-provoking.

My concerns are rooted in the amount of personal information and details the author shares about her daughters. As a professional in the child welfare sector, I am cognizant of how important agency over one’s own story and experiences is. TINDERBOX details a lot of the author’s personal story . . . and the stories of each of her three children. I am hopeful that the author discussed the narrative and details with her children before sharing. I have a feeling that, given her quest for awareness throughout her journey, she absolutely did so.

I was surprised at how deeply the author shared her spirituality and faith; I wasn’t expecting it, but I found that those details were some of my favorite parts. I also admired how deeply committed the author and her husband were to find the right help and support for each of their children–how often they shared their “no matter what” commitment to their children. I appreciate the moments of vulnerability and “brokenness” that she included, as well. Far too often, families touched by adoption, foster care, and kinship care feel like they are the only ones feeling a certain way. I respect the courage that Lynn Alsup demonstrates throughout her story.

Author: Lynn Alsup
ISBN: 978-1-64742-541-8
Count: 1